Valve Advises That The Best Place To Seek Refuge From Coronavirus Outbreak Is Abandoned Artifact Servers

Valve has offered a beacon of hope to gamers concerned about the Coronavirus outbreak, offering shelter in the most abandoned and desolate place known to man, Artifact’s servers.

President and CEO of Valve Corporation, Gabe Newell, made the statement this morning on his Reddit account, however he was sure to avoid any 3 references as per usual.

“We have a large number of dedicated Artifact servers sitting there empty, and they’re a great place to take refuge,” Newell wrote. “It’s a great opportunity to give Artifact another chance too!”

The CDC was quick to certify the servers as a Coronavirus safe haven with a message posted to their website.

“We have confirmed that Valve’s Artifact servers are the best place for users looking to self-quarantine to avoid possible exposure to the COVID-19 Coronavirus,” the CDC statement read. “The servers have not seen any activity in months and have been classed as a giant clean room for individuals to hide.”

Several gamers reportedly attempted to seek shelter in the servers, but quickly left after being prompted to buy packs of cards for any chance to win a game.

“I’ve got a friend who’s a doomsday prepper,” said one Steam user after logging out of the game. “He’s been set up in Digg for months.”

“Well, I can confirm that the Artifact servers were empty and seemingly safe from Coronavirus,” said another gamer. “But honestly, after 5 minutes in there I think I’d rather take my chances with the virus.”

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